First two days of VLCD down, at least 26 to go! Now that I am getting back in the routine, I realize I missed blogging, its very therapeutic, and we all need a little therapy every now and then :). I am still detoxing from my diet coke addition and dealing with a little bit of headache from that, but its not nearly as bad as last time. Now, I know to drink a couple cups of coffee with some vanilla stevia and cinnamon or a cup or two of Yerba Mate tea and it helps. I am also detoxing from the emotional connection to food that I went through last round. Even though I was much better at perspective during maintenance, I did find myself going back to getting excited about what I was going to eat and putting too much emphasis on it. I always think of a Kevin James stand up routine where he is talking about how excited we get when we are waiting for our food at a restaurant and when we see it coming out of the kitchen, how happy it makes us. No matter how involved a conversation is, we get so excited and watch it as they bring it to the table. Thats how I am, except I think about how I am going out to eat on a given night that morning and my excitement builds all day. Stupid. Anyway, so on this diet you are forced to not think about food, because if you do you are constantly disappointed with what you have to look forward to. I told a coworker yesterday that you know you are on a diet when you look forward all day to an orange :). I have learned so much from doing this, and I am very thankful to have stumbled upon it. I share on office with someone and I am sure that I get annoying when I start talking about the diet because I get so excited.
Even though I KNOW that it works, I am still waiting to actually say I have lost this round. I am on Day 5 and I have almost lost the six pounds that I gained from the load days. Its hard not to compare to last time, but by day 5 in round one I had lost over 5 lbs INCLUDING the load weight. Granted, i only gained like 2 lbs during my first round load, but I guess its just hard to realize that even though I have lost 5.5 lbs in the past two days that I really haven't lost anything yet. Tomorrow, hopefully, I can report my first loss for round two and boy am I ready. I don't think it will be possible for me to withstand a third round, so I am talking myself into going for as long as I need to this round to get to the beloved 148, even if it takes 45 days (gasp). (I know my heart breaks every time I think of it :) ). I just CANNOT come this far and not make it my goal. It is so important for me to reach that since I never have. I think until I prove it to myself I will not believe it. And this is where I have to draw upon strength from God, because I know that I can't do it on my own. He gave me the tools and the strength, but I still have to choose to use them. Okay God, I am using them! (I also know that daily I ask for His patience, and I know when we ask God answers by giving us opportunities to use patience, I just hope he doesn't make me use it too much this round :) )
Last night was really hard for me, I seem to be dealing with hunger more this round. Not unbearable, but last night I went to bed around 9 (I get up at 4:15 am) and my husband stayed up and microwaved a chicken pot pie. I was drifting off to sleep when the aroma filled our bedroom. From that point on I tossed and turned thinking about the flaky gooey goodness. I was soooo hungry. My husband is super supportive, and I know he didn't know that he was driving me stark raving mad. I should have just got up and sprayed some febreeze, but I just suffered through it. I was miserable. This morning my tummy was growling before I got out of the shower. I am hoping this will subside after a couple more days, but I was confused after I talked to a rep at yourhcg.com when I bought my second round drops. I told the rep that I had seen some comments about how the second bottle people received didn't seem as potent or to work as well as the first one. I asked her if it was possible to get a bottle that was not as effective and she said yes. I really didn't like that answer so I asked how we were supposed to deal with paying $100 for a bottle and it not guaranteed to be as strong as the one before and she said you just have to increase the drops per day. I didn't like that answer either, but didn't really have any other options. I still wonder sometimes what actually is in the bottle. But thats neither here nor there, I have gone on and on about it in past blogs there is no need to revisit it. Proof is in the pudding right? Mmmm...pudding :)
Todays Weight: 170.0 Starting weight: 169.4 Total lbs lost: +.6 (still losing load weight)
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